I rediscovered Alanon a little over two months ago. Some people have that light bulb moment of awareness when they realize that their lives have been affected by alchololism. I feel that I have known my whole life that I was affected and continue to be affected by the disease. I first came to Alanon as a teen. I participated in Alateen, but never grasped the full understanding of the program. It wasnt until very recently that I finally had the light bulb moment... like the sun rising out of a black sky.
I found myself at 28 years old in another failed relationship, a mediocre job and a social life revolving around the next night out or party. I decided to start living through the pain that I have been trying so hard to cover up. Life is hard, but its better than not living at all. I have no idea what I want in life. I have never actually taken the time to figure that out, but through this program I am beginning to learn what I don't want. Piece by piece... one imperfect day at a time.
I have been inspired by the people I have met and have read about over the past months. I hope and pray that through meetings, keeping this journal and my HP that one day at a time I will continue to discover me.