Thirty

It has come to my attention, unwillingly of course that I am "the woman with issues". I turned 30 years old on March 14, 2010. Instead of joy, I brought pain upon my family and most importantly myself. I had a minor melt-down which prompted in a large fight with my family and the realization that I am not happy. I am not happy at all. When am I going to stop letting my past dictate my present. 30 seems like good timing to me. I am not sure where to begin on all of this. It has been a long time. Over a year since my last post. Much has changed and even more has stayed the same.

My mom bought me a book about a year ago. I read the first few pages and set it back on my book shelf. Yesterday I picked it up again. I think it might be time. I need to stop carrying around all of this hurt and anger. I need to learn to forgive the people that hurt me. I need to learn how to forgive myself. I am most scared of letting go. Once I have done that, what will I have left? I am looking to re-write my story. I don’t want to be "the woman with issues anymore".

I will be reading 'The Forgiveness Formula' by Kathleen Griffin over the next months. I am hoping to use this blog to work through the pain, anger, hurt and sadness. I am hoping to forgive.